The Weekly Review of Bad Golf Played Amiably:
The Commish, The Orioles, and the BGA Schedule Converge at 12

Day of Infamy, July 28, 2010:

• The Toronto Blue Jays beat the Baltimore Orioles for the 12th straight time this season;
• The BGA Central Office announces that there are 12 rounds remaining on the schedule to determine the winner in The Race For The Cheeseburger;
• The Commish has a meltdown and sets the high score standard for the 2010 season with a "snow over par" 12 on hole #8.

In an exclusive interview with our own Scribe, you can read the gory details as the Commish explained exactly how The Golf Gods made him implode and go from first to last in the matter of a few(?) mis-struck shots. In the interest of journalistic integrity it must be reported that after the interview the Commish attempted to hit himself in the head with what looked to be a 4 iron but he missed that shot, also.
Mr. FourSkin (BC) played a solid round and won his only brewski of the month at the fabulous Crackpot Restaurant, where all of the patrons are good-looking and above average, just like in Lake Wobegone, or else they are drunks, deadbeats, and losers. (Apparently it seems that you get a different answer depending on whether you ask a BGA member in good standing or the spouse of that aforesaid member.)
For the record The Commish shot an even 50 for the round and had to buy a beer BC who recorded a round of 43.
For more details see The Scribe's Report.

From the BGA Committee For Consistent Nomenclature:
A proposal was made by the chairman of this prestigious committee that the Myrtle-like achievement of the score of an even dozen by the Commish from here on be termed an "Egger". In an obvious reference to the common packaging used for that incredible, edible poultry product, Chairman BL suggested that its usage be similar to "The Orioles pulled a reverse EGGER when they lost their twelfth straight to the Blue Jays."
While initially it does not appear to have the impact of "a Levering" or "a Levine" the BGA Board of Directors has placed it on the agenda for consideration at the next meeting held at Casa De Capo in the Dominican Republic.

The Trivia Contest: The next trivia contest (August 11) for a beer will be "All About Mr. Fifteen (CS)" as we try to guess just exactly what kind of golf he will play. Will there be snow (8), blow (9 or El Nino), Pavoratti (10) or even possibly an appearance by that grumbling oldtimer, The Streckfus (11)? As usual, the lowest number of correct answers buys a cheap beer for the winner. Tie breakers will be used only if necessary.

Hole 1) Will CS hit his drive into the fairway, right of the fairway, left of the fairway or short of the fairway on #1?
Hole 2) Will CS record a bogey on hole #2?
Hole 3) Will hole #3 be sand free for CS?
Hole 4) Will CS have recorded a par on any of the first four holes?
Hole 5) Will CS beat, tie, or lose to BC on hole #5 (gross score)?
Hole 6)  Who will be closest to the pin on hole 6? (must be on the green but can say no one)?
Hole 7) Will CS have low net score, be tied for low net, or not have low net after 7?
Hole 8) Will CS be on the green in regulation on #8?
Hole 9) Will CS beat, tie or lose to RS on hole 9 (gross score)?
  "Sudden Death" TIE BREAKERS (if needed):
 #1) What will the high hole score be for CS during this round?
 #2) Will CS have a net score of 36, less than 36 or greater than 36?
 #3) Will CS have recorded 3 fairways, more than 3, or less than 3 during this round?
 #4) Will CS have won more $ at the C-Pot than BC before today's round?
 #5) Will CS have recorded 17 putts, less than 17, or more than 17 putts during this round?

Another Don't Miss Feature:
Be sure to check out the Monumental Achievement Awards that are being posted for The Myrtle Experience. Myrtle Beach has produced some truly astonishing golf from our intrepid Bad Golfer brothers. The Crackpot's own raconteur and gregarious bartender, Kevin "C'Mon Thirteen" Levine has at least two "moments to remember." 

Mr. Fifteen in the lead for The Race For The Cheeseburger
Even with a poor statistical month CS (Mr. Fifteen) is the only player in contention for winning the annual cheeseburger dinner at the Crackpot Restaurant. BC made a huge push in July and has shown improvement every month after a very slow start. Meanwhile, CS continued his slide each month and is now only slightly above his play of 2009 so the final 12 rounds should produce some interesting play.
End of Month Standings 
April:  BC -21.1, BL -9.1, CS +12.8, RS -39.8
May:   BC -17.0, BL +4.3, CS +10.5, RS -16.4
June:  BC -15.5, BL -4.1, CS +3.2, RS -9.9
July:   BC -4.5, BL -3.1, CS +1.6, RS -10.2

Upcoming Events (see Schedule)
Wed., Aug. 18, TBD @ Mt. Pleasant
Wed., Aug. 11, 5:26 @ Mt. Pleasant
Wed., Aug, 4, 5:26 @ Mt. Pleasant

What is a "Mashie"?
Do you know what a mid-mashie is? How about a niblick? If you have ever wondered what these names really mean then click here.

COMING SOON...."The Squirrel's Nuggets"
At the moment we are in pre-production of a series of 90 second FREE GOLF TIPS and instructions from Gary Marlowe, a golf instructor and former PGA Tour pro. If there are any particular problems you would like addressed then please "Ask The Commish" and he will be sure to pass them on to Gary.